The Young Purposeful Widow: Navigating The Journey Of Being A Widow While Discovering Her New Life With Tomice Scott

Widowhood Real Talk with Tina | Tomice Scott | Purposeful Widow

  Today’s episode delves into the love, heartache, and resilience of a phenomenal woman who defied the odds. Tomice Scott, a Mental Health Counselor, faces challenges like teen pregnancy, relationship instability, and societal pressures, yet she perseveres and achieves her goals of getting an education and becoming a successful mother. She leads us into the pages of her life as she navigates the journey of being a widow while discovering her new self as a young, purposeful widow. Tomice built a community for young widows through Purposeful Widow to provide the support system young widows needed as they traverse into the new phase of their lives. She also shares tips to navigate the complex emotions of dating after losing a spouse. Tomice’s journey is a testament to the power of the human spirit. Join us as she shares her experience and offers hope and inspiration to anyone facing loss. I am sharing my experience of loving the same man for 32 years, a mother to two adult children, a retired military officer, a breast cancer survivor, and my connections with others. Anyone experiencing suicidal thoughts should reach out to a suicide hotline or local emergency number in their country: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/suicide/suicide-prevention-hotlines-resources-worldwide — Watch the episode here   Listen to the podcast here   The Young Purposeful Widow: Navigating The Journey Of Being A Widow While Discovering Her New Life With Tomice Scott Tomice Scott, welcome to the show. When you hear welcome to the widowhood, what’s the first thing that comes to your mind? When I hear that, it’s something that I’m still getting used to, but it is something that I am starting to embrace and taking it by stride, not looking at it in necessarily a negative aspect, but more in a way of to shed light on others. When somebody’s looking at you or when you look at yourself and you think of what a widow is and then you see yourself, I know people are going, “Tina, you say a widowhood, like she’s part of the widowhood.” That means you are a widow. You’re right, Miss Tina. I never in a million years would have expected to be a widow at the age of 37. As a matter of fact, when I heard the word widow, I was always thinking, “That’s somebody that’s 60, 70, 80 years old.” I never would have imagined holding that title at the age of 37. It is definitely something that I never would have imagined. It’s true. I am a 37-year-old widow. Thank you. The other thing to consider is that you have actually accomplished a life goal. We take these vows and we sometimes easily go through some of the things we say, and not everyone’s vows say this, but it’s very common until death do us part. Even though it’s painful, it is difficult to know that we ended our relationship in the most organic way versus a divorce or a separation. There is some honor to that and we try to find that glimmer of hope in this painful experience.     Yes, you are absolutely right. I had an issue where I was constantly. When you go through losing a spouse, you oftentimes focus on the fact of the loss. The thing about it was you’re absolutely right. I had a good 4 years married to my husband, but I’ve been with him since I was sixteen years old. We have two kids together. I tend to cherish all of the memories that we had. I’m glad that I’m with him. You’re right. Unfortunately, it ended in the other D word, death versus divorce, but times that I look back and I actually got a chance to experience love. I got a chance to experience being a wife and raising our kids together. It’s those memories that shed a little light on becoming a young widow. Thank you. Let’s talk about that sixteen year old and who is this gentleman that you met and how did this all start?     Tomice’s Beautiful Love Story I have such a beautiful love story. I thoroughly enjoy telling it. I met my husband through a mutual friend in high school. My husband’s name was Shasta Scott. He was a basketball player, a very great basketball player for high school. Basically, his best friend was dating my best friend. His best friend said “There’s this guy. I think you guys will hit it off very well. He loves basketball, but I think you could be the one that could come into his life. I think you would be a good match.” At first, I was like, “No, I’m focusing on my studies. I don’t want a boyfriend. I’m about to graduate.” She said, “No.” I said, “No.” I’m not trying to have any type of relationship. I want to get through high school and go to college, and then I’ll think about a relationship. We ended up exchanging numbers. At that time, neither one of us had a driver’s license. I called us phone pals because all we did was talk on the phone. We couldn’t see each other, but our connection was strong. We had a very great connection. As time went on, I eventually got my driver’s license. You can say we were on a blind date because I had never seen him in person. When you said sixteen, I envisioned video chatting. I envisioned being on the phone and seeing each other. Numbers were exchanged. No one saw each other. Also, we had those little, I don’t know if anybody remembers those Nokia phones where you can text as long as you got minutes on there, but as soon as those minutes run out, you got to go reload. That is where we were. There were no iPhones then. Believe it or not, iPhones had not come out yet. We were strictly communicating, texting and talking to each other throughout the day. I got my driver’s

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