Beyond Widowhood: Embracing Life’s Second Chances With Heather Hunt And Tina Fornwald

WRT 29 | Widowhood

  Through the depths of loss, the journey of two widows unveils the resilience of the human heart – embracing new love while treasuring cherished memories. Life’s surprises bring solace, and in companionship, we find the courage to keep showing up, keep loving, and keep living. In today’s episode, we’re diving into a topic that’s both tender and transformative – dating and marriage after the loss of a spouse. The widows Heather Hunt and Tina Fornwald sit down and share their extraordinary experiences with us. Heather tells her story of how she got engaged after the loss of her beloved Bryan. She takes us on a poignant exploration of what it means to embrace new love while still cherishing the memories of a dearly departed partner. Tina also shares her unique path to walk and how she navigates the dating world as a widow. These strong widows’ stories remind us that life has a funny way of surprising us, often when we least expect it. Brace yourselves for a tale of love, loss, and unexpected twists!  Thank you for viewing this post. I am not a licensed therapist or professional life coach. I am sharing my experience of loving the same man for 32 years, a mother to two adult children, a retired military officer, a breast cancer survivor, and my connections with others.  Anyone experiencing suicidal thoughts should reach out to a suicide hotline or local emergency number in their country: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/suicide/suicide-prevention-hotlines-resources-worldwide — Watch the episode here   Listen to the podcast here   Beyond Widowhood: Embracing Life’s Second Chances With Heather Hunt And Tina Fornwald This conversation is about dating and being a widow. Also, this conversation is me sharing with you that I have gotten married. I know you didn’t see that coming. I’m going to have this conversation with my girlfriend, Heather, who is a widow and engaged. We’re going to share our experience with you. Let’s get into the conversation.     We are going to talk about being a widow and dating. You may be salty or mad at me some people, but we are going to keep it like the real talk. First of all, I cannot stand people that are judging you because you decide to date being a widow. If you choose not to date, that’s perfectly fine too. Dating or getting married is not a solution to being a widow. It is not, “I survived widowhood.” It’s just a path that you chose to take because you felt like you had more love to give. You wanted to be remarried. Also, I was with my husband for 32 years. Heather was with her husband for seven. Almost eight. We both were happy with our spouses. Me deciding to get remarried or get engaged doesn’t equate that we didn’t love our spouse. Don’t say that. Don’t guilt trip us and say, “I guess you weren’t happy.” We were not happy about it at all, but those are some things that I’ve heard about people that are dating or widowed, I’m going to tell you that. I want you to email me. I want to hear your opinion about it, but we’re going to talk about our dating experience. Any other things you want to get off your chest before we talk about it? There is no timeline. Whenever you feel like you’re ready, go for it. I don’t think there’s any certain, “It has to be one year.” When you’re ready, you’re ready. You can be salty. Let me know about it. When I thought about dating, I was like, “Tina, you are a whole 50-plus-something person with grown kids and how is this going to work? What are Catherine and Alex going to say?” I could not even think about another man holding my hand, let alone kissing somebody or what that was going to look like. It was devastating. Mark is dead. I’m about to be out here like I was like, “I took after you part. I’m out here on a second go-around now.” Interestingly enough, my dad’s mom had been married multiple times. I knew it was a capacity in my bloodline to do this. The first way for me to do it is I started dating online because I didn’t know if I could like how that was going to work. I don’t know what your thoughts were about dating. In this day and age, back in the day, meet at a bar, at a dance club, or something. Library or grocery store. Things have changed and so I did the dating app. How was that? That was not fun at all. I want to know some of the bad dating experiences. A couple still lived with their parents. Mind you, I’m 40 now. Grown girl. You don’t need to be 40 and living with your parents. If you do, that’s your choice, but you can’t date out. There are certain situations where it’s acceptable. Bounce back or accept, but you’re talking about like they are up in there and not even trying. Not trying or looking to find anywhere else to live but looking to get married or date again. You need to get yourself right first. I did wind up talking to a widow, which was interesting. I thought, “Maybe this will be a connection. He’ll understand. I understand.” That backfired. I don’t think he was ready to be out there. It sounded like his late wife said he couldn’t get remarried. You bring up a couple of good points, being ready to be out there. What were some signs for you to let you know you weren’t ready to get out there? Constantly talking about him still. Being totally emotional knowing that I wasn’t in a place of moving forward or ready to bring somebody else into the equation. When you date somebody, they don’t necessarily want to hear all about your late husband right up front. You need to be in …

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