Permission To Grieve: Getting Through Loss With Suzanne Jabour

Widowhood Real Talk with Tina | Suzanne Jabour | Permission To Grieve

  In a society that does not know how to properly deal with people who are getting through the loss of a loved one, one must learn how to give themselves permission to grieve in their own way. Suzanne Jabour, a certified grief educator and transformational coach, is changing the paradigm around grief through her very own three-pronged approach. She explains how individuals can navigate through grief according to their own terms, as well as what it takes to create grief-resilient workplaces. Suzanne also celebrates his son Ben who died at 22 and shares how she cherishes his memory by sharing stories about him. I am sharing my experience of loving the same man for 32 years, a mother to two adult children, a retired military officer, a breast cancer survivor, and my connections with others.  Anyone experiencing suicidal thoughts should reach out to a suicide hotline or local emergency number in their country: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/suicide/suicide-prevention-hotlines-resources-worldwide. — Watch the episode here   Listen to the podcast here   Permission To Grieve: Getting Through Loss With Suzanne Jabour Our guest, Susan, is a grieving mom who found meaning in her loss through providing grief education, sharing how grief works, and how we can support people experiencing it. Her three-pronged approach is designed to change a paradigm around grief. She works with grievers to chart their path through conscious and curious grief coaching. She trains grief-informed leaders and transforms businesses through her Grief Resilient Workplace Program. She is available as a speaker to share her story and help normalize grief as a healthy response to loss, big and small. She has a BA and BED and decades of experience as a trainer. She is a Certified Grief Educator, Transformational Coach, and Workshop Leader. This conversation with Susan is going to empower you about things people shouldn’t say in grief, how to manage grief in the workplace, and being able to transform memories and experiences as we create our new normal. Let’s get into this conversation now.     Susan, welcome to the widowhood.  Thank you so much for having me. When you hear welcome to the widowhood, what came to mind just hearing that put together? It’s such an interesting phrase. I think for me, because I’m not a widow, I feel like this honored guest because I have all these other kinds of loss, but I don’t have that particular one. I just feel like this honored guest in this space of women who get that aspect of grief and that experience. It’s so interesting to me because I often feel like there’s a parallel between the loss of a child, which is the most recent grief that I experienced, and the loss of a spouse because it’s those people who are so intrinsically tied in your life. I’m sure we’ll end up talking about that, but I’m so fascinated by that parallel. I just feel like an honored guest in this space. Thank you so much for having me. Thank you for being here. I want to expound a little bit on the particular choice of widowhood because I am originally from Chicago and the word hood means family to me. When my late husband Mark passed away, oftentimes, people just looked at me being a widow, but Mark’s loss encompassed more than me. It was his children that lost a father. It was his siblings who lost a brother. His nieces and nephews lost an uncle. My siblings grew up with my husband being in their life and they were at a young age that even though he was their brother-in-law, he was more like Uncle Mark. My nieces and nephews looked at him as a dad. The intentionality was not just to frame this only to include the loss of widows but to include the loss of everyone. If my husband’s parents were still alive, they would have lost a child. His parents left this world, but it was intentional to make sure that everyone who has lost a loved one knows that they have a place in this conversation. As you mentioned, grief, I don’t try to compare it. Everyone’s most difficult grief is the one they are experiencing now. I know, and you probably heard this, that people try to compare, well, the loss of this is worse than the loss of that. No one’s going to win that argument, but what I can do is win by holding space for you and being a safe area and letting you know that I see your pain and what you are feeling is real. You are welcome here as we all learn to walk in this process and this journey together. Thank you for that.     I love two things about that. I love the idea that it’s like your family, like this is your widowhood. It’s your people, your squad. I think that’s so important because one of the things that happens in grief in our culture is to end up feeling so isolated. That concept of having this space where. We get you. You are welcome here. We get you. We will not turn our backs. We will not run away. We will not say something. We might say something awkward, but it won’t be a cliche or platitude because we’ve all heard those and thought about how stupid they are.  We can almost land there, but I will mention this. If you’re reading this show, Widowhood Road Talk 15, and we do have our own Discord, and it is a safe space for people to connect because sometimes you meet people, you don’t want to particularly give them your phone number, but you want to be able to engage with other people and find encouragement in community.  That is something that I am very encouraging for people to have a community. We found that by doing it on our Discord. If you’re interested in being part of the Discord, you can message me,

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