Widows and widowers often become victims of catfishing schemes because of the false notion that they have immense wealth and overflowing bank accounts. But most of the time, they have already exhausted their money to pay for funeral and medical bills. AJ Coleman is here to share some preventive measures to avoid being catfished, especially if you are in the online dating scene. He breaks down some warning signs of fraud and the common tactics fraudsters use to target vulnerable individuals on the internet. AJ also explains how to report catfishing, why you do not have to suffer from shame after being a victim, and why trusting your gut is your most valuable weapon. I am sharing my experience of loving the same man for 32 years, a mother to two adult children, a retired military officer, a breast cancer survivor, and my connections with others. Anyone experiencing suicidal thoughts should reach out to a suicide hotline or local emergency number in their country: Psychology Today Suicide Hotlines and Prevention Resources Around the World. — Watch the Episode here   Listen to the Podcast here   Avoid Becoming A Catfishing Victim With AJ Coleman Widowhood, dating online come with challenges. Do you know the warning signs? Do you know the preventive measures that you should have before dating? Do you know what catfishing is? If you’re interested in this, which I know you are, you want to pay attention to this next episode. AJ, who is a professional in this arena, has tips that you want to hear. Let’s get into this conversation now.         AJ, welcome to the show. How are you? I’m feeling good, how about you? I’m always well, thank you for asking. I’m excited to be here. Thank you. When you hear welcome to the Widowhood, what was the ticker-tick in your mind, like what popped up first? When you see the words come across, there is no distinction between widows versus widowhood. I think about it more, so is it really where can I help? What can I do? That’s usually my first thought is I don’t look at stereotypes. I don’t look at other labels or anything like that. My focus is on how can I help and how can I help our readers to get where they want to go and grow. The Danger Of Catfishing That’s fair. It’s interesting that it goes in line with what we’re going to talk about, which is the catfishing, identity fraud, and things of that nature. A lot of people in the widowhood community, male or female, are very vulnerable. You and I both know that this is a conversation worth having. You said in our pre-conversation, even more so coming up next to tax season, and people maybe having a little extra money and feeling a little generous, and making sure that they’re not being duped. I’m excited to have this conversation. Me too. Talking about fraud is near and dear to my heart. I’ve been in the fraud business, more so in detection, not committing fraud for 24 years. Thank you for making that distinction. It’s definitely a unique career field. I enjoy what I do. I’m very passionate about what I do but I also understand there are a lot of people out there that are really skilled at what they do. They just may not have the proper tools to combat fraud. That’s where we come in. It’s interesting when you talk about catfishing, people think immediately it’s about phishing. You think about you’re going to a stream and you’re throwing out the rod, but in the fraud world, it’s basically a scheme or a scam when someone creates a fake identity on a social media or a dating platform and really pretends to be somebody else with the ability to deceive. As widows, widowers, a lot of times they get caught up in the catfishing because they’re looking for companionship, support. There is just this notion out there that when widows and widowers first become, they have all this amount of wealth coming through. That’s not the case. Most of the time, it’s used to pay for funeral expenses, sadly, maybe hospital bills or other medical bills, but it also may be used for proactive measures of counseling. It’s not like we inherit this great windfall of money. Unfortunately, as the widower, as widows, we become ripe, we become victimized into this catfishing scheme. Thank you for explaining that. For someone that’s not familiar, the idea, “Why would somebody want to catfish me? I’m not important. I don’t have a lot. I really shouldn’t have to worry about that.” What would you say to that type of response? It happens to everybody. Different names, different races, different statuses, social, and financial. It can happen to any. A lot of times, these fraudsters or these individuals that victimize their people will take the time to build up this storyline to get to know you. They don’t really know in the end what you have financially. They don’t know what you have in terms of the capacity to recognize that maybe the who you’re talking to isn’t who they say they are. It’s unfortunate that there are people out there, but it is a large industry. A lot of people out there that just real people in. It’s really unfortunate because when people get victimized, they lose their life savings. They become embarrassed. Now it brings whole new psychological disadvantages because now they’re ashamed, and I’m not a licensed clinician or a doctor, but in some cases, it may lead to suicidal thoughts because of the embarrassment. That’s very scary. As we get closer to not only the tax season and getting refunds, which hopefully everybody is getting. We need to be careful about who we are communicating. What are some of the warning signs that are out there? How do we detect it, and what do we