Widowhood Real Talk with Dr. Tina

How To Dream Again After Losing Your Spouse: Finding Hope, Healing & Purpose With Chanoa Inez

Widowhood Real Talk with Tina | Chanoa Inez | Dream Again After Grief

  In this inspiring episode of Widowhood Real Talk with Dr. Tina, Dr. Tina welcomes Chanoa Inez, author of Dream On: How to Create the New Life of Your Dreams After Upheaval or Loss. Chanoa shares her remarkable journey after the sudden loss of her partner while traveling abroad and the long road of healing that followed. Together, they discuss what it takes to move beyond survival mode, rediscover hope, and intentionally create a meaningful life after devastating loss. Whether you’re newly widowed or years into your grief journey, this conversation offers practical strategies, heartfelt encouragement, and the reminder that while grief changes your life forever, it doesn’t have to end your dreams. If you’ve been wondering whether joy, purpose, and hope are still possible, this episode is for you. I am sharing my experience of loving the same man for 32 years, a mother to two adult children, a retired military officer, a breast cancer survivor, and my connections with others.  Anyone experiencing suicidal thoughts should reach out to a suicide hotline or local emergency number in their country: Psychology Today Suicide Hotlines and Prevention Resources Around the World. — Watch the episode here   Listen to the podcast here     How To Dream Again After Losing Your Spouse: Finding Hope, Healing & Purpose With Chanoa Inez Our conversation with Chanoa Inez is going to be something you will remember for quite a while. Chanoa talks about being stuck in a cloud of grief and feeling like she can never get herself out of it. There was the moment where she realized she deserved more, and she realized she could and deserved and had the capacity to dream on. Let’s get into this conversation now.       Chanoa, welcome to the Widowhood. Thank you, Dr. Tina. When you hear Welcome to The Widowhood, what do you think? Rethinking the Definition of Widowhood To Widowhood, even though technically a part of it, I’ve never used that word. I guess first because I was not married, but second because I always think of it more like someone who’s maybe in the last chapter in their life, or they feel like they’re the last chapter of their lives, and they decided I’m never going to try. I’m never going to grow for love again. That was it. Now I will be alone forever. That is never something I’ve heard in the context of this show, but there are a lot of people that feel like that in widowhood. That word makes you feel like I’m done. I do not have anything to hope for. That life has completed itself. That’s because widowhood is often connected to someone older, someone who is way past in their life and has done all the different things, but yet they’re not done. It’s never. People do not feel like it’s connected to someone younger. Now you mentioned you’re part of it, but not part of it. Can you elaborate on that a little bit more? I would say because, when my boyfriend passed away, we had plans to get married. He even wanted to start having children shortly before he passed away. I delayed it because I said, “We’re moving to another country.” Obviously I had some guilt about that, as you can imagine. It would not have, it was not supposed to be that way. We were not married. Everyone considered us like, that’s it. I was the stepmother basically to his son, and we lived together. I would say technically, I think they usually reserve it for people who are married. Do you think that’s unfair considering the level of commitment that you had and how invested you were, and people are not seeing what you’ve lost for what you have because of a term? Yes, thankfully, like family and friends, nobody looked at it that way. They knew how we were. They were inseparable, and everyone knew our commitment to each other. It was complicated, in some ways, like, for example, we pulled our funds and moved to a foreign country, and he passed away within 24 hours. We were not married. I had no access to the funds. Thankfully, I had friends who helped me out. Protecting Assets in Unmarried Relationships Eventually, his family was able to get that money out. It was just able to be like, let that be for his son. Those are the kinds of things you do not think about. You’re like young people, and you’re like, “We’re moving and we need a foreign bank account,” and all these things. There are so many technical ways, like even if somebody ends up in a hospital and they have not passed away, where if you’re not married, then it’s very difficult because technically that paperwork, they’re going to see things differently and you’ll lose access to certain privileges, I’d say. I did not think about this when we had our pre-episode conversation, but hearing you talk about it now, what advice would you give to someone who’s in between? We’re married, and we’re in this committed relationship that would be a good safeguard for them and their partner. It really depends on the nuances of what they need to protect. I would definitely say some paperwork, for example, us deciding, “Let’s put our money together and put it in this account. My name should have been on the account. There should have been some there.” We’re just thinking. We’re young, of course. We’re waking up tomorrow, and everything’s fine. There’s nothing to do there. Just that, like, see what nuances you have together. You live together, and one of you owns the house? If something happened, would you want the other person to have that house? This is paperwork that needs to be taken care of because you’re completely shut out if anything happens, regardless of family’s efforts. Thank you for that. That is going to ring true to people because people that are tuning in

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Through Grief-Colored Glasses: Finding Hope After The Unthinkable With Vicky Edgerly

  In this moving episode of Widowhood Real Talk with Dr. Tina, Dr. Tina welcomes grief educator, author, and speaker Vicky Edgerly, whose life was forever changed by the loss of her son to suicide, her daughter to cancer, and her husband to suicide. Rather than allowing grief to define her future, Vicky discovered a path toward healing that transformed her pain into purpose. Today, she helps others navigate life’s most difficult losses with compassion, wisdom, and hope. Together, Dr. Tina and Vicky discuss surviving complex grief, supporting widows and bereaved parents, finding meaning after unimaginable heartbreak, and why healing doesn’t mean forgetting; it means learning to carry love forward. Vicky also shares insights from her memoir, Through Grief-Colored Glasses: A Life Reinvented by Devastating Loss, and the lessons that continue to inspire grieving families worldwide. I am sharing my experience of loving the same man for 32 years, a mother to two adult children, a retired military officer, a breast cancer survivor, and my connections with others. Anyone experiencing suicidal thoughts should reach out to a suicide hotline or local emergency number in their country: Psychology Today Suicide Hotlines and Prevention Resources Around the World. — Watch the episode here   Listen to the podcast here   Through Grief-Colored Glasses: Finding Hope After The Unthinkable With Vicky Edgerly Widowhood, our conversation with Vicky, she is going to share about suicide. That’s the conversation that people try to shy away from. They do not know what to do when we have no choice but to talk about it, but to experience it and to give you hope of what life can look like. In Vicky’s words, if you choose to, Vicky has dealt with the suicide of her son, her husband, and the cancer death of her daughter. Yet she has found a way to have hope and provide encouragement and support to other grievers. Let’s get into this conversation now.     Vicky, welcome to widowhood. Tina, thanks for having me. I’m grateful and humbled to be here. Your story, your life has a lot of layers. When you hear, “Welcome to the Widowhood,” what’s the backstory? What are you thinking about when you hear that? To be honest with you, Tina, I pushed back against that title when it first was applied to me. I want to say maybe 2 or 3 months after my husband Leo died, I went to attend his mother’s funeral. She passed away. I was surrounded by his family members, and one of his sisters started walking me around the room, introducing me as Leo’s widow. I hadn’t had that experience yet. It slammed into me. I wasn’t sure what I felt about it. I cried about it in my hotel room that night. I wore it like one of his old shimmy shirts that I used to put on just so I could smell the wood smoke from our fire pit, the forest that he always walked in. Evolving Beyond The Identity Of Loss I wore the title, Widowhood, as a warm blanket for a while until there came a time and a chapter in my life, about right after the second year, at the end of the second year, that there was an occurrence in my life that made me realize I had to let go of the marital relationship. I dropped the name Widow at that point as well. It still applies to me. I’m not Leo’s wife. I am his widow, but I am no longer approaching the world wearing that title upfront. It just comes out naturally in organic conversation. Thank you for sharing the evolution of that. I know for myself, when someone identified me for the first time, it was shocking. It took my breath away. Someone who has not become a widow, I think it’s hard to understand. It’s just a word. Why does it matter? It’s just like everything encompassing in that. I was like, “That’s where I am. That’s my life right now.” I can appreciate how you shared that over time your connection with that word changed. For someone tuning into this conversation, to realize the way you feel now versus the way it may change later, it has the potential to shift. That is important because some people feel like their death is final, but the way in which we engage it has the opportunity to adjust over time.     That is correct. Absolutely true. Your life is layered, and we have an amazing book, Through Grief-Colored Glasses: A Life Reinvented by Devastating Loss, and devastating loss indeed. Before we dive into the book, can you tell us about all three of the people in your life that have brought you to this place? Reframing Devastating Heartbreak Into Love It was a crazy ride for sure. Devastating in the beginning, but by the time I traveled through it all, I learned to actually love my story. It is, I think, a romantic story. Think about movies like The Notebook, which is centered around death. Is it not? However, it celebrates all of life. We all come away with tears, but our hearts are cracked wide open after witnessing such a beautiful story. I feel, just as a caveat to the readers or the audiences, that my story is beautiful. This is the place I’ve come to at this point in my life. It didn’t start out that way. In 2002, my eighteen-year-old son, Adam, took his own life. Unfortunately, twenty minutes after wishing me a happy Mother’s Day on the phone and telling me he loved me, he was gone. That was devastating. I will not get too deep into it, because we could be here all day with that particular story, but it rocked my world. I had no inner compass. I had no guidance for how to deal with grief, pain, and loss. Growing up, religion was just something we dabbled in on Easter and Christmas. It wasn’t

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Widowhood Secret Santa Program Application

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Bringing Joy & Support to Widowed Families

This application is open to all widows and widowers with children between the ages of newborn to 18 years old. Special needs children over the Age of 18 are also eligible.

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Please share a little about your situation, what this program would mean to you, and any special circumstances.
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  • All gifts will be handled through your Amazon Wish List link.
  • A completed consent form must be submitted for consideration with this application.
  • Nominations will be announced on September 1st.

Walk For Love 2025

Support grief awareness and Walk For Love in style. Proceeds help fund free grief support programs. Merchandise is available now, with new batches printing every 15 days — so order early to ensure you receive your items before the August kickoff on August 3,  2025

🛍️ How It Works

- Order anytime — Bonfire prints new merchandise every 15 days

- First shipping window: Orders placed by July 11 ship between July 1–11

- All items ship directly from Bonfire

- Order early to wear your gear for Walk For Love in August!

👕 Apparel – T-Shirts, Sweatshirts & Hoodies

🛒 Order here: https://www.bonfire.com/walk-for-love-2025-1

💲 Price: $23–$42

📏 Sizes: Youth to 3XL

Over 20 different colors

📝 Notebook

🛒 Order here: https://bonfire.com/walk-for-love-2025-notebook-1

💲 Price: $22.99

Great for journaling, writing affirmations, or gift-giving.

☕ Mug

🛒 Order here: https://bonfire.com/walk-for-love-2025-mug

💲 Price: $19.99

Sip your morning coffee with a message of love and remembrance.

🚶‍♀️ Travel Mug

🛒 Order here: https://bonfire.com/walk-for-love-2025-travel-mug-1

💲 Price: $24.99

Keep your drinks hot or cold while walking for love.

💧 Water Bottle

🛒 Order here: https://bonfire.com/walk-for-love-2025-water-bottle-2

💲 Price: $29.99

Hydration meets heart — perfect for walkers everywhere.

📣 Additional Notes

At checkout, encourage shoppers to select your board member's name from the referral dropdown to help us track outreach.

Use and promote hashtags: #WFL2025 and #WRTWT

Perfect for walking during the event or repping all year long.

Mental Health Walkathon to provide encouragement and inspiration for the grieving struggling with depression and isolation.

During the Walkathon, we walk together, united in our mission to support mental health. From August 3 - 9, 2025 we encourage you to walk one mile daily. Share your journey by posting a picture on your favorite social media platform with #WRTWT #WALKFORLOVE, and let’s inspire others to join us.

Funds from the Walkathon will allow Widowhood Real Talk With Tina to conduct an Annual Grief Garden and a Butterfly release ceremony and provide participants journals & pens.

Three ways to participate

Purchase merchandise ~ In Development

Donate: https://app.99pledges.com/fund/walkforlov

Make your pledge, 1-mile daily day August 4 – 10, and post #WRTWT #WALKFORLOVE: https://app.99pledges.com/fund/walkforlov

To Start your pledge team, email widowhoodrealtalk@gmail.com for details.

Register on Eventbrite: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/1223004923649?aff=oddtdtcreator